A Mother’s Day Tribute

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Dementia, Mother's Day, writers, writing

My mom is missing. Well, her body is still with us, but the person she was isn’t here anymore.

As some of you know from past posts, my mom has dementia and has been slowly slipping away from us for years. She is now officially a shell of her former self. It is sad. She is in a memory care unit at a nursing home and the last time I saw her she didn’t know who I was.

I was very close to my mom when I was growing up. We were buddies.

Twenty years ago, before I understood what was happening to her brain, her behavior made me start to pull away from her. Her words and actions made it seem like she didn’t care about my family or me. I didn’t yet know she wasn’t able to process information. She lost her ability to empathize, whether it called for celebration or comfort.

Let me give you an example from about ten years ago:

Me: Mom! Guess what! I was promoted and received a nice raise.

Mom: Oh. I see. Did I tell you that Dad and I are going golfing in Monterey?

It hurt. I now know she couldn’t put the meaning of my words together and hid it by changing the subject. But numerous interactions like that damaged my relationship with her.

Mother’s Day is approaching (you are welcome for the reminder to call your mom) and it has me thinking . . .

I learned a lot of things from my mom. I’m not talking about sewing or properly sorting laundry, although she did teach me that kind of stuff as well. I am talking about intangibles like:

Surround yourself with books.

Music is a part of your soul.

If you are going to tell a story, make it interesting.

Stop to admire a rainbow, or for that matter, any form of Mother Nature’s bounty.

Take on an adventure.

Make an ordinary experience an adventure.

A meal with family and/or friends is more than just nourishment.

Set the table and light the candles . . . even if it is over reheated leftovers.

A home is not just where you hang your hat. A home must embrace you with comfort.

Dogs are a must.

Laugh often, even if it is at your own joke.

Why not dance when you clear the table?

Circa 1979.

So, my mom may be gone, but she a part of my being. I hope I have passed such things on to my girls. Rather than being sad about my mom’s condition, I try to remember the good times we had when she was whole.

Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there.

Happy Cinco de Mayo

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writers, writing

Some puns are so bad they just have to be shared.

The margaritas are on me, folks!

Salud!

 

You can always count on me for some dumb humor.

Nancy Drew Turns 85?!? How Can That Be?!?

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Nancy Drew, writers, writing

Nancy Drew, girl detective, turns 85 today. She sure has aged well. She doesn’t look a day over 18.

Why the heck is there a
clock in a field?
Image Credit: Wikipedia

As a preteenager, I was a Nancy Drew mystery groupie. I would devour a Nancy Drew book, sometimes two, in a day. I read every copy in my junior high school library, saved money to buy my own, and swapped copies with my equally nerdy best friend. My exasperated mom said to me, “For Pete’s sake, put down that book and go play outside!” I foiled her attempt at making me get exercise and took my book to the park and read it there.

Did you know that Ms. Drew has sold 9 million video games since 1998? I had no idea. The newest, which will debut May 19^th is called “Nancy Drew: Fifty Shades of Grey.” KIDDING!! It is called “Nancy Drew: Sea of Darkness” and is set on a ghostly ship in the Netherlands.

Jenn Fisher, president of the Nancy Drew fan club (there is a fan club?) said she likes the games because they put the player in Nancy’s shoes and into the crime-solving action. The chief executive of the maker of the video game, Her Interactive, said that she likes that girls have their own series of games. Let’s face it . . . it is a male-dominated world of video games bent on pretending to blow things up and kill people. On a side note, the last video game I played was Pong and I might have been reading a Nancy Drew book at the same time.

The maker of the Nancy Drew video games estimates that 90 percent of the games’ players are girls. I bet the other 10 percent is Bruce Jenner.

All jokes aside, the company also said they get a lot of fan mail from their gamers who say they the Nancy Drew video games have been inspired to make their own games and get involved in science, technology, engineering, and math.

Wow! A video game can do all that and solve mysteries too? Way to go, Nancy Drew! For being an old lady, you rock!