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Robin Coyle

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Robin Coyle

Tag Archives: Puns

Punography

08 Friday Mar 2013

Posted by robincoyle in In Search . . .

≈ 107 Comments

Tags

Jokes, Puns, writers, writing

I love a good joke. Who am I kidding? I love a dumb joke too. My favorite type of humor is dry wit. I don’t like mean-spirited dry humor. That’s just not funny.

When something/someone makes me laugh out loud, my day is complete.

Why is it that jokes are hard to remember? But here is one I heard years ago and it makes me laugh every time. It is one of the few jokes I can remember.

Cue dumb joke . . .

A man went to Antarctica and decided to bring home a penguin for his penguin-loving son. His son sets the penguin up in the bathroom tub with plenty of fish. The thoughtful boy put March of the Penguins on a continuous loop.

The dad becomes tired of Morgan Freeman’s voice and the stench of fish coming from the bathroom. He tells his son to take the penguin to the zoo. The boy and penguin are gone all day and when they walk in the house together the dad says, “I told you to take the penguin to the zoo.”

“I did take him to the zoo, Daddy. Then we went to the movies.”

~~~~~ 

I am also a fan of puns.

Punography at its finest.

Punography at its finest.

So, heard any good jokes lately? Share ’em here. Happy Friday all!

Puns for Father’s Day

17 Sunday Jun 2012

Posted by robincoyle in In Search . . .

≈ 52 Comments

Tags

Father's Day, Puns, writers, writing

These puns made the email rounds a while ago, but since I forgot to buy a Father’s Day present for you, I am re-gifting. Be prepared to groan.

Happy Father’s Day! Give your dad a hug from me.

Puns for Educated Minds

1. The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9. A hole was found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, “You stay here; I’ll go on a head.”

13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, “Keep off the Grass.”

15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

17. A backward poet writes inverse.

18. In a democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes.

19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you’d be in Seine .

21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looked at him and said, “I’m sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.”

22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turned to the other and said “Dam!”

23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.  Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One said, “I’ve lost my electron.”

The  other said, “Are you sure?”  The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive.”

25. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

26. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did . . .

27. Gandhi walked barefoot, and he fasted a lot which leads toill health and bad breath – Gandhi was a super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis. ~ Credit to Lynne Ayers.

On a serious note, Happy Father’s day to the best father on the planet. I love you honey!

Best Father on the Planet accepting his award.

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